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For the multitude of mess ups that I’ve had in my life, one would think that I would remember that after a mess up is usually a time of great progress. This last week is no exception.

After possibly pushing too hard on Sara the other night (and getting over the idea of throwing in the towel on this project) I decided to do very small, informal lessons to get back on track. My first lesson was showing Sara an “art project” that I did (until the wee hours of the morning) – it’s the picture on this blog post, not sure the name but I call it a 10 square. We counted the pinks and greens and that was it.

I made the thing because I found it on some Montessori math sites and it looked pretty cool. Afterward I realized that I wasn’t exactly sure what to teach with it. After fiddling a little while I decided that she needs to recite every column – 0+10 =10, 1+9=10, 2+8=10, etc. I suppose a few nights of that will help with memorization of those combinations.

Next lesson I learned a cool technique from my business partner on math memorization. Take 3 or 4 flash cards and put them in a “daily” folder. Do these flash cards every day, multiple times. After a week, put them in the “weekly” folder and put new flash cards in the daily folder. Once a week review the old flash cards – then after a month of that, put the original set in the “monthly” folder.

What an amazing technique so far. I started with a couple basic and a couple problems that she was having to figure every time she saw them..3+4 and 6+4. After 3 days (2-3 times a day), she just remembers them – bam….memorization 101.

So Sara is back on track but she hasn’t earned her build-a-bear back yet. She needs to do some extra help with math for that to happen. That’s were my biggest joy to date has been.

The extra work is helping Sophia (3 years old), with her math. We are learning numbers, shapes, colors and basic addition. I had Sara help me with a lesson on Friday, I showed her what we were going to teach and let her go. I coached her along the way making sure she gave lots of positive reinforcement and wasn’t too much of a perfectionist on some of the lessons.

Sara was so proud of herself and excited about being the teacher. Tonight after her lesson she asked what Sophia’s lesson was going to be tonight so she could prepare for it.

I know that I quoted this scripture in the last entry but, as with many scriptures, it’s meaning changes with perspective, today we rejoice in hope;

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation and be constant in prayer (Romans 12:12)

This blog series is one daddy’s efforts to teach his 7 year old 1st and 2nd grade math; the victories and defeats, trials and tribulations, success and failures. It’s not easy to share the fails but we have to keep it real.

I’d been traveling for business for a couple days and came home late last night. At 2 am Melissa woke me up to say that she had to take Sara to the emergency room because of an asthma issue. They got home around 4.

Tonight after work I figured we better get back on track with math so we were going to do a few minute lesson. Well, Sara wouldn’t have anything to do with it. Sara is particularly sensitive and emotional and when she doesn’t want anything to do with something, hell or high water won’t make her do it.

So what do I do? I could let her slide and start again or remind her of our contract and she isn’t to fuss about lessons. This is something I struggle with constantly – when do you reach the point of no return on enforcement? If I ask Sara to do something and she pushes back, at what point is it ok to say it’s not worth battling (not past the point of no return) and to engage and make sure that she respects what I ask her to do?

Well today I thought that asking Sara a couple times to do a math lesson was past the point of no return, so I engaged. I didn’t get angry or physical with her, I reminded her of our contract and that she agreed to do lessons every day without a fuss. I gave her multiple times to compose herself then she got the count down from 3…2….1. Ok, you broke the contract and now you don’t get your build-a-bear.

You can imagine the drama that followed.

Trying to teach is a humbling experience. You want them to learn new things but not nuke them with too much, enforce rules but don’t cause harm. You want them to love learning – but how/where does discipline fit in?

Did I cause harm? I’m not sure. Am I trying to teach too much with contracts (and breach thereof) and other big lessons for little people? Again, I’m not sure. What I am sure of is that we are both learning during this summer experiment and hopefully we will both be wiser when it’s over.

So now we tenkan (pivot and turn) and go in a new direction.

I’ve spent the evening researching teaching methods, praying and making new, more artsy math toys for tomorrow. For tomorrow is a new day and a new opportunity.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation and be constant in prayer (Romans 12:12)