Keeping it real; fails too

This blog series is one daddy’s efforts to teach his 7 year old 1st and 2nd grade math; the victories and defeats, trials and tribulations, success and failures. It’s not easy to share the fails but we have to keep it real.

I’d been traveling for business for a couple days and came home late last night. At 2 am Melissa woke me up to say that she had to take Sara to the emergency room because of an asthma issue. They got home around 4.

Tonight after work I figured we better get back on track with math so we were going to do a few minute lesson. Well, Sara wouldn’t have anything to do with it. Sara is particularly sensitive and emotional and when she doesn’t want anything to do with something, hell or high water won’t make her do it.

So what do I do? I could let her slide and start again or remind her of our contract and she isn’t to fuss about lessons. This is something I struggle with constantly – when do you reach the point of no return on enforcement? If I ask Sara to do something and she pushes back, at what point is it ok to say it’s not worth battling (not past the point of no return) and to engage and make sure that she respects what I ask her to do?

Well today I thought that asking Sara a couple times to do a math lesson was past the point of no return, so I engaged. I didn’t get angry or physical with her, I reminded her of our contract and that she agreed to do lessons every day without a fuss. I gave her multiple times to compose herself then she got the count down from 3…2….1. Ok, you broke the contract and now you don’t get your build-a-bear.

You can imagine the drama that followed.

Trying to teach is a humbling experience. You want them to learn new things but not nuke them with too much, enforce rules but don’t cause harm. You want them to love learning – but how/where does discipline fit in?

Did I cause harm? I’m not sure. Am I trying to teach too much with contracts (and breach thereof) and other big lessons for little people? Again, I’m not sure. What I am sure of is that we are both learning during this summer experiment and hopefully we will both be wiser when it’s over.

So now we tenkan (pivot and turn) and go in a new direction.

I’ve spent the evening researching teaching methods, praying and making new, more artsy math toys for tomorrow. For tomorrow is a new day and a new opportunity.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation and be constant in prayer (Romans 12:12)